It’s been almost a month now I’m working here. I’m trying my best to overcome my lack of tolerance toward other, maybe I’m not fully change, but I manage to have a friend. She’s one year younger than me, pretty, and she’s like James. I don’t want to make her hate me because I don’t want her to know that I’m James fiancée. Having friend that’s not come from your place is really nice, I’m poor before, and get rich in no time, so I forget these kind of feeling again. Feeling that if you want something, you must try hard to get it, and I forgot the feeling talking about what do I like, who’s your crush, or what song do you often sing? I forgot all of that because, I’m being darken to beat my father for his sins to us. I forgot to look down; I’m to proud looking up to the skies that full of white cotton candy so I don’t see anything else but sweetness. I guess, made a friend makes you want to give up everything just to make them trust you and so do you in return.
But my heart still in pain, but I guess this is the end.
‘How many times must I call out to you?
How loud does it have to be for you to hear?
I have never rested from an exhausting love so
when will you recognize me? When will you begin to love me?
If you were me, then it would be so easy.
Even if you put more rocks onto my heart,
it can never outweigh the longing ness.
Until the moment my eyes become hazy I want to watch.
Even if I wait, can you not come? Am I not in your tomorrow either?
I can’t put away my heart before you come
but will the day when I have to forget, still come?
If I try to forget then will I really forget?
Everyday forgetting first…
It starts with the heart set on forgetting,
but by forgetting myself will I forget you?
-Hwileelee, Lee So Young’
“Today, we’re having pizza day. You coming aren’t you?” Shin Bi asks me to tag along with the other co-worker, because I don’t have anything to do, I say yes. We go to the pizza house; James is in the group too. That’s maybe the reason why Shin Bi is very eager to came, so, I don’t make anything suspicious in front of her, and avoiding him as much as I can.
When people said that ignorance is a bliss, I think they doesn’t understand if they put them self in my shoes. Being dumped by your boyfriend is better than cast away by your good friend, that night I eat a lot of pizza, and drink a lot of beer too. I know James have warn me not drink too much and Shin Bi almost take my glass and I make a little fight with her defending my freedom of being drunk is okay. She gives up and hand me over my glass again, James was worried about me, but I don’t give a damn.
In his team house, Tae Min eyes are worn-out from hectic schedule of practicing all day. His efforts is recognized by his senior Hak Jun, but Hak Jun is very annoyed with Tae Min just acting so weird these day since he and his friend have some fight about a month ago. Coach Kim is worried about him either. Tae Min in a previous game two days a go is putting his effort and put the team on the final match in the next three month.
“Man, cut it off will you. You make me scared, Tae Min.” Hak Jun sits in his chair beside him.
Tae Min stopped his activity, looks at him and put his earphone on his desk. He takes a deep breath, stretches his both hand up. Tae Min is very tired indeed, but he push him self too much in his teammates eyes.
“The final is in three month, Tae Min. Can you just loosen up a bit?” Hak Jun gives him yoghurt and put it on his desk.
“Yeah, I guess I must loosen up.” He answers. Tae Min closes his eyes for while because he feel a bit dizzy for staring too much on the computer screen. “What times is it?” he added.
“One o’clock in the morning. And don’t ask me why I’m still awake, because my only reason is you. You are acting so weird, first I think you are obsess with me. But, when I think it over again, man, it’s not right? All of this is not because you want to beat my record. Want to talk?” Hak Jun turn his chair at him, waiting for his approval. Tae Min grabs his yoghurt and drinks it.
“No. You better sleep hyung. I don’t want the pillar of our team get sick because of me.”
“Aisshhh…you bastard.” Hak Jun is smiling at him. ”Pillars? What pillars? You take this so seriously, man. Everybody think that I’m rehearsing like a mad horse because my good report in every game, I’m scared of loosing the game too, but I have my own happiness that’s control everything. And I just want you have that kind of happiness too, see Tae Min. Off the record, I hate you so much because from day one you enter this team, you made it to the line up of the best pro gamer in the country. I nag you a bit that day, still remember?”
Tae Min seem doesn’t know about it, he thought that Hak Jun doesn’t have the envy kind feeling towards him. He trace back to the time he’s been announced at the television that he is in the line top 18 pro gamer in just short period of time because he’s winning a lot in so many match.
“You envy me?” He asks Hak Jun with curiosity.
“At those times, maybe yes. But I start to think that we’re on the same team, one boat.” He looks like a middle old man giving his son a lecture about life.
“Hyung, you’re grown up now!” Say Tae Min proudly to his senior.
We still at that pizza house till late at night, I’m never as drunk as today.
“It’s enough, Mel. You’re too drunk. I give you a lift home, Shin Bi, help me carrying her stuff.” He asks her to do what he told, while his hand lift me up and half dragging me to the parking lot, he put me on the front seat. Shin Bi is taking the back seat, and then he drove up. The road is rather empty, maybe because it’s in the middle of the night.
“Thanks for taking her home, sajangnim. You’re a nice, guy.” Shin Bi praise him for what he done for Mel. James looking at her and smile troughs the front mirror.
“I’ll take her home first then take you home, you don’t mind don’t you?” He asks her.
Shin Bi smiled full of agreement on her face.
Not too long, they finally arrive in her place. Ki Uk stared disbelief looking at Mel in his brother arm when he opened the doors.
“Wow, what happen to her?” He helps James to bring her in to her bedroom.
“She’s drunk. I’ll be back after taking her home, Ki Uk.”
Before he say anything James already gone. Ki Uk doesn’t know how to handle a drunk people before, he went back and forth down to the kitchen, bring a bowl of ice water and a towel and clean her face slowly.
“I knew it would happen, sis. After a month drowning your self doing good deeds, you fed up do you? Aishhhiii…and my brother is a fool by liking you. Park Tae Min, he’s not only your friend right, he’s more than a friend…eeyyy…”He’s irritated because he’s talking with a drunken human being that in no time will puke on the bed or on the floor. He put the towel covering her face, and walk to the living room. This is got to end. He doesn’t know what to do, he likes Park Tae Min but he doesn’t want his brother to get hurt as well.
James standing in a small alley, her house is a bit rough out side. He entered her house, but her mom who still sitting in the living room floor watching television just looks at her, but when she notice that her daughter bring a man into the house she erupt like a volcanoes and jump right at him.
“Omma!” She yelled at her mother. ”Don’t make me embarrass, he’s my boss.” Look at her mom with eyes still begging to don’t make any hilarious scene.
“Oh…hahaha” She smile with embarrassment. ”I’m sorry…sir, it just my stupid daughter rarely bring a man to this house since the day she was born.” She explains with her funny tone. James smile.